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Showing posts from October, 2018

#354 - King Dad & Fallible Google

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Motto: Mic Check One Thousand Two Hundred Twelve

I have a kid. He's really cool. He sleeps a lot. He eats a lot. He's very large for his age. His temperament is incredible. He smiles all the time. He's pretty easy to soothe most of the time. He looks like me mixed with Melissa, which I suppose is obvious but is really neat. 

Today Griffin giggled for the first time. I about cried out of happiness. That's something I never really experienced before having a kid. I think there's a country song about that. Being a dad can be pretty cool.

In other dad-related news - my lawn mower wouldn't stay running. I took it apart, cleaned the carburetor, and put it back together.



Then it fired up on the first pull. Then I over-the-top-celebrated for a solid half hour before mowing the lawn.

So that gives me dad cred... but I'm not king dad. Griffin doesn't have king dad. Griffin's grandpa was king dad. For evidence of that - see Column #301.

Moving on.

Hollow Knight was…

#353 - Lyrics to No Song + Hollow Knight

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Motto: This is Shooting-From-The-Hip Poetry at Its Nothingest

Before we start - expectations be framed.
Each bits of this is self-contained. 

I've written a book.
The main character was a clock.
I gave him a tic;
so th-this is how he would talk.

Pet peeves with which everyone agrees:
Slow drivers. Slow walkers.
Loud eaters. Loud talkers.
Pet peeve that's just for me:
Using the flash at 100+ feet.
Learn how pictures work, idiot.

The price tag of the new iPhone is XS-ive.
Yes I'm aware it's pronounced "Ten Ess" and not "Ex Ess"... but I'm just not good at making tennis jokes, love.

Not all of these are going to rhyme.
I cannot do that all of the time.
They also might not fit in meter.
Because I forget to check.

Do things the right way & have a nice start to your day.
Aaron's assertion, annoying as always:
Be better by being bounded by burden.
Cut corners cause cascading consequences.
Don't dilly-dally. Do due diligence. Delayed duties drive d…